Sometimes I Win

Good bye 2007.

It took waiting to the last days of the year to win big. It's all going okay now and this game of Rummicube was a highway sign.
Yahoo! Two points to add a little humility, to remind me it shouldn't be all perfect.

Peace for 2008.

Choir Comedy

I'm loving "Clash of the Choirs" during the writer's strike. Let's hear it for Team LaBelle!! Here's some more good choir TV-worth the download time, really!
Merry Christmas!

Advent

I came home today from school with no academic projects barkin' in my basement. What a complete joy! I'm done except for a multiple choice final a week from Wednesday. Mark is coming in two days and will be here for Christmas. He'll be able to see Joel's show on the 19th. His room's all ready upstairs.

I broke down and turned on the heat today, just long enough to take the edge off. Why do you think I have all these sweaters? There has to be some occasion to wear them! I lay awake for an hour last night before I piled on another quilt and slipped on some socks. Growing up in Seattle meant the COLDEST icy sheets this time of year. It will never be that bad again!

So I loved the classes I took this past fall and I'm really looking forward to new ones come January. But yeah for now! I am celebrating this Advent season being at home and enjoying attentiveness to The Wait.
Go get yourself a hot beverage.

It's difficult to rest after being on the move. I really need to rest. I need to rest from worry. I am better at trusting, but that means I can't think about it too much, or else, guess what? I'm worrying!

Karin is home; joy! and I am finishing up projects at school and wondering aloud, "Why am I going to college?" But the routine is very good for me and I feel like I do "know" stuff now. I have learned to avoid the sharp corners in my life for the moment and am simply enjoying the wonderous people around me.

We went to Joel's show at the Knitting Factory last night. So good. The night before was a fun show as he played with The Fling in Long Beach.... ("Holding on to what I think I'm feeling...")
I'm praying for my friends; watching some hearts go through some treacherous moments and thinking about what the new year might bring me in way of travels and projects.

But now I need to go sit down.

Spinning

100% Merino Heavy Worsted

Spinning

I blended handpainted kid mohair and merino from Laurie Lawson and merino top.
My first full skein!

approx. 418 yds.

Something new to write is only
tracing the markings once made.
Made in me deeply
where memories pool.

It flared up again that reignment
of finery that cloaks over
love and slow breathing
and waiting for a cool mist to
finally settle.

I copy your pose of resolution
and set my ear to hear music
that has begun from
ages far away.

I still can feel despite this pill
and I can still hear the rhythm
set by senses
cast like dye that
never cleanses.

I pray that prayer that now is
mere memory of faith
and trace your outline with the
faded grey
freeze framed
a chemical.

The Basics

It is easier to belong to a faction that simply tells what Jesus Christ has done for me, and easier to become a devotee of divine healing, or of a special type of sanctification, or of the baptism of the Holy Spirit

It's one of those days. I am letting some peace come into my spirit by just allowing my thoughts to rest on Jesus Christ. I look for him everywhere. It has been a dense fog of late. But my only imagination can be this: That I can know that I am at peace with God.
This is His reason. And when nothing else adds up, then I meditate on one thing that is a conclusion. God is at peace with me. The gospel tells me this. It is the only thing I am listening to now.

But as Chambers goes on to say, the Apostle Paul preached the gospel. I need something to settle on. I may not have the job of telling it like Paul felt he did, but I am needing it like water. Peace like water.

Italy

...sights from my time with Karin. We avoided arrest from the Italian Bus Police and abduction along a dark Tuscan road. I'm only being a little dramatic. I am once again humbled by International travel. It is not the cloth of which I am cut, but I loved having Karin to myself for 10 days. The weather was fantastic. My favorite thing, despite the dark evening walks, was the hostel tucked up against the Northern Hills of Florence. Thank you to the orchestra players who practiced late into the night. Thank you to the friendly man on the Venenza canal boat, who despite his wife's embarrassment, tried his best to speak English with me. Thank you to Karin for braving me and my sporatic travel plans and spending her break with me. 5 1/2 weeks and counting!

This

...describes my life.

the most lovely thing

Contact Note
by Jon Hopkins

...from the decemberists

find it and listen with me...

Red Right Ankle Lyrics

Courage and Surrender

I can feel when I rub against the grain-
the slight edge to air and light.
It’s all a matter of pleasure-
the discernment that lays between
courage and surrender

I could give up the basics and fly
I could grasp what is seen and lie
Patient toward time for the sake of vision
Industrious with circumstance; provision

A process pulls in the hands of God
A resistance caves in my heart; I’m soft
which says to some I must be weak
and brittle though emotions fuel my dream
a little-
A little dream I search for at night
the keeper of wisdom kept from sight

Open the eye and take the same
or finger the edge, rough hewn-
untamed

just waiting

Karin is in London, traveling with Vanguard classmates. We met other families as we waited in line to check in. It started to feel real for her about then. But me, I have known all along. It was harder this morning as I walked past her room. And when I came home wanting to tell her about the two-year old I fell in love with today at VBS. I passed Old Navy and remembered that I would have to find someone else to go with me. But today I'll start the sweater she picked out for me to make her.
It's okay. I haven't cried yet and I'm not planning to. I refuse to be sad about how much these few months hold for her. We are just merely on two roads that will meet again.

Show @ the Plush

We stepped into the whole envelope of sound.










I embraced them all for the first time, so thankful for the moment, each one of them so necessary. Gratitude makes for great accoustics.

Coley and I had a healing time together this weekend. We talked always, save for sleep. We saw old friends. We nodded in recognition of the same old things.

Our lives are intricate, rich with currency of experience and heart. We spend ourselves for the ones we love and the ones who are hard to love.
In Ventura we also grieved. It was far from easy. We said goodbye to attitudes that had us hooked and people who could not meet us. We said goodbye to those who we could not meet. We are thankful for our friendship, and in that open space, we ponder the actions of many people, wondering what goes wrong, as well as what is right in the meeting. Then we move on.

I grasp at faith in God because of the beauty of it. Faith makes my life and the eyes with which I see a harmony. The reflex of God doesn't make me knowledgable, but it does make me wiser. I am better off in a larger company with those of faith than I am in the isolation of the rational.

...and it was good.
to see others having the same heart and now, to let go and move on.

road miracle

This bulletin was posted from Francisco the Man's myspace. Click on the post title to hear them. They sound better than ever now! Thank you for this, God:

Hello everyone.

As of right now, we are in a city called Willow, just past Sacramento and 30 minutes from Chico. We are sitting in a hospital, Nestor and Angelo in line to get checked on by the Doctor. Abdeel is in there right now.

Last night as we were walking to our van, we noticed that someone broke into it and stole a couple things. It was the first show of the tour, and we got robbed because SF is full of crackheads that walk around like Zombies talking an unknown language. The front passenger window was fully knocked out as well. We should have realized that the worst was yet to come, but hey, we're optimistic!

Our next show was supposed to be in Portland, which is about a 12 hour drive. So we decided to leave right after the gig. We left at about 2 o' clock. Everyone was pretty much sleeping the whole night. Abdeel was sitting in the passenger seat, covered in a blanket because it was so cold. We made a little bed in the back where all our equipment was that was positioned on top of Ange's bass cab. That's where I was sleeping.

About 3 hours into the drive, we lost control of the van, swerved a couple times, did a 180 and flipped 2 or 3 times.

We ended up landing on all 4 wheels.

With me sleeping in the back, Abdeel sleeping with no window, and everyone except the driver not wearing a seatbelt, we probably all should have died.

It was pretty much a life changing experience for all of us. In only the second day, our tour is over.

But the most important thing out of all of this is that everyone of us came out literally with no injuries. A couple brusies and sore backs, but that's it. God was seriously watching over us tonight. Words really can't express how grateful we all are that we are still alive. Jessica said that it might be God saving us from something worse that was gonna happen later on. We got robbed, but we didn't leave. Maybe it took an accident like this to make us go home. I also think it really showed us that we might have been taking things for granted (music, talent, family, friends, life) and that this was our wake up call.

After the hospital, we will be checking into a hotel and getting some rest. We will also be renting a van so that we can leave as soon as possible.

So we are in the process of canceling all our dates, except the Plush gig in Fullerton. And rest assured, with all that has happened to us this weekend, both bands will come through with things you have not seen.

Please pray that we can make it home safely. We are all shaken and changed by this experience, but we are holding on to the comfort that we will be with all of you soon.

God is love, and rock & roll is loving one another.

Blessings,
Aren, Scotty, Simon, Joel, Christian, Nestor, Angelo & Abdeel

JEPROCKET & FRANCISCO THE MAN

open places left after

If your Elijah comes to me now
with my bowl and jar
overturned
You cannot be expecting a thing
from me.
My son and I;
we are prepared to die.

If you bring me hope through a
prophet’s love, all
untouchable
You shouldn’t shame me when
I dream again
My heart within
has long expected to die.

If we together watch this miracle
soft flour green
oil fragrant
You break all former contracts
that bargain death
My soul loves him-
we are bonded to expectation.

poem home

This sweet lyric shack holds music. I want one.

solidarity w/ the captive

What does one say when shaken
and metered? Can silent
expression command
tidefalls; projections?

An outburst of costly saved
spent observations
to take in a tale born of pain
leaves me pensive

Still willing to trust that
there's something trustworthy
-in the eyes; past the parting
which tells us of stories

I listen still faulty, in
worlds, seperate, foreign-
Your flesh takes blood too
to keep it from failing

I listen with healing as you
would listen to me
not you God, not your wisdom
as you are not free.